Human

Humankind is rotten through and through. We have a history of cruelty against each other. We destroy – not only the earth around us, but also our own bodies. And we do it knowingly, in most cases.

We are brainwashed to become humanists.

“humanist – of or pertaining to a philosophy asserting human dignity and man’s capacity for fulfillment through reason and scientific method and often rejecting religion; “the humanist belief in continuous emergent evolution”- Wendell Thomas”

Sounds beautiful, doesn’t it? There’s even a so-called Christian Humanism for those who balk at the idea of religion being rejected. Except when the humanist is asked to define human dignity or if he is placed in a situation where he has to conclude that there is no fulfillment possible through reason. As for the scientific method… Excuse me while I snigger. Drug trials funded by the companies manufacturing the drugs?

We are educated to become cruel in the guise of being kind. Very few of us are able to see through the phrases which become devoid of meaning in the instant that they become personal. And it is only when someone near to us is affected that we begin to care enough to say: Enough!

We need instant gratification. We want to be associated with success and anything or anybody who does not correspond with the world’s idea of successful gets margnialized. We pity them, we say. Not taking into account that pity is a largely useless emotion. Unless it prompts us to do something useful for the person we claim to pity.

I had an interesting conversation with a friend who is knowledgeable in the field of art history. Primitive people grow up without an awareness of the landscape, he says. The land is merely is source for survival. But it seems awareness is something that needs to be nurtured in all cases. He took art students in their first year out on field trips and many of them confessed that this was the first time in their lives that they’d been made aware of things like the formation of the clouds or the light on water. And most of these students were people who grew up in sophisticated homes.

The other day we drove past a settlement close to the Drakensberg’s Kamberg nature park. The Drakensberg is a World Heritage Site. It is amazingly beautiful. Yet, barely five kliometers from the gates there are people using the crystal clear streams as refuse dumps. Yes, they probably don’t have a refuse removal system. But what stops them from creating their own? Agreeing to dump refuse in a designated place for example. Are they oblivious to the damage they do? Does the outline of the mountains towering above them mean nothing to them? Is chaos the preferred state?

Apparently yes, no and yes. If my friend is correct, the people living there is as unaware of the beauty surrounding them as a colour blind person of colour.

So is doing damage knowingly worse than damage done through ignorance? Whose responsibility becomes damage done through ignorance?

The answer, in my opinion, is: Ours. We who do know better. The people to whom the clouds and the light on the water and the breathtaking scenery were pointed out. The people who should be educating other people. (Whether the education will make any difference, is another question altogether.)

As for the people doing damage knowingly…

May God help them.

I’m not really talking about art history or landscapes or pollution here, of course.

Bland no more

I opened the washing machine – chuffed with the fact that I was ahead with most of my chores for the day – and stared in disbelief at the mess inside. A disposable nappy got washed with the other washing and after not being able to absorb any more moisture, it burst open. Two hours later, after scooping up handfuls of water absorbent crystals from the washing machine, putting it on a rinse cycle and rewashing the clothes (twice) my chores were way behind schedule and I felt as if I sneaked a week’s worth of living into one day.

The day before the kids had played in mud. Their sand pit had rain dripping into it, creating a lovely mud bath and before I knew it, they both sat down in the mud. They were as happy as clams and looking the part too. For the better part of an hour they scooped mud into containers, ran their hands through it and gleefully laughed at the mess. At some point I decided enough was enough, closed up the sand pit and started with damage control. I stripped both naked. Magnus was missing a shoe and I found it where it had been sucked into the mud. I rinsed most of the mud from the clothes and wiped what I could from Magnus. Marco allowed me to hose him down. Magnus’ sopping wet disposable nappy got taken off and I rushed both the boys inside to a hot bath. The nappy was bundled up with the clothes and, absentmindedly, I must have thrown that, together with the soiled clothes into the washing machine. Clever.

We decided to move Marco into the room we’re using as a nursery for Magnus. He’s not sleeping well by himself and Dirk ends up sleeping with him most nights. The problem comes in when Dirk has to leave for work early. Sometimes I can convince Marco to get into bed with me and sleep another hour or so, but often he’s disoriented and does not get back to sleep properly. We thought that sharing a room might help. So far it’s not really working, but we won’t give up yet.

Friday, a bit tired of the bland interior of what is now until further notice, the boys’ bedroom, I decided to repaint it using leftover paints. All we needed was a new bigger brush and a roller which we went off to buy.

Marco was all fired up about the project. I set him to work on masking off the skirting while I put the washing on the line and tried to get Magnus to nap. Tried being the operative word here. Marco had done masking the skirting for the bigger part of one wall before he got fed up and came to see where I was. He wanted to know when we could start the actual painting and no amount of explaining about all the preparation work that still needed to be done could convince him that he couldn’t start painting straight away.

I took off one of the seventies-style wooden pelmets as I want to fit a blind at that window. For the longest time I had contemplated doing that and couldn’t quite figure out how to get the nails holding the pelmets down out. Then I realized I simply needed to knock the pelmet off by using a hammer and some force. We live and learn and soon the dark pelmets overwhelming the bathrooms are also going. That is a promise!

Then I discovered a problem with damp on two walls where I had to scrape off bubbling paint. Eventually I only started painting after lunch. Marco helped me do some brushwork and I allowed him to use the roller to get a feel for it. But he’s too impatient and after I made him go back and redo a patch, he got annoyed and left to go play. I was so concerned with him not making a mess, that I spilled paint all over!

At some point Magnus went to sleep, but woke up not quite rested and very angry with the world at large and me in particular. I had to carry him on my hip the rest of the afternoon as any attempt to put him down resulted in high-pitched wailing.

At bedtime on Friday I’d only done two walls in a neutral colour and they were sorely in need of another coat. I was starting to second-guess our choice of bright green for the other two walls, but I choose to look at it as a temporary thing anyway. The boys will not want to use a little room off their parent’s bedroom forever. Hopefully. And so the room wil eventually be used as part of the master bedroom suite again at which point I’ll repaint it. For now they both seem to enjoy the colour green and it goes somewhat with the green wall to wall carpet.

The painting’s officially finished and I’m happy to report that it looks fabulous. Marco came back and actually helped a lot. The paint was just enough for two coats. I’m not afraid of using colour and this is a really strong green – think apple or maybe shallot. Because the walls I’ve used the green on have windows which face onto the garden I feel that my eyes are drawn outward into the garden and that it makes the room feel bigger. And the neutral we’ve used is a very light beige with a lot of grey in it, making it appear cooler. It is a nice foil for the warm-toned green.

I must make up blinds for the bay window and one other window. I’ve got a checked fabric in toffee and cream that I once bought for duvet covers and never used. I also need to fashion cushions or upholstery for the window seat and I’m leaning towards vinyl upholstery. Leather would have been much nicer, but my budget does not stretch that far. Magnus has a toffee and green coloured duvet and I’m using a toffee and cream checked duvet that we had for Marco at the moment. A friend gave Marco some vintage advert plates with cars on them for his birthday and I’ve put them up above his bed. We have a lovely silkscreen print depicting a sunflower field and I intend putting that up. There are also prints of two darling fat cats that Magnus enjoy and a little painting with a herd of sheep that is framed in a similar way and they will look nice grouped together.

For the first time in a long long time I wasn’t feeling that I’m keeping tears just at bay. A lot of heaviness had lifted and the effect lasted for most of the weekend. I know it will be back. But it is also nice to know that there are things which can lift the sadness.

Hey, at the very least the room isn’t looking bland any more.