Comments on: Hello, soul mate. http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/ A child with Cerebral Palsy is just as sweet as any other. Losing a child, is another matter altogether. Thu, 05 Nov 2009 03:05:33 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: Hello, soul mate. · It’s My Soul http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-396 Hello, soul mate. · It’s My Soul Fri, 29 Jun 2007 19:11:30 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-396 [...] post by vygie for Soul [...] [...] post by vygie for Soul [...]

]]> By: terriblepalsy http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-380 terriblepalsy Tue, 19 Jun 2007 10:55:43 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-380 I hope things go the way you want them to Nelba. I have everything crossed that the birth is smooth and that you are blessed with a baby brother or sister for Marco (and Loren) to love. I hope things go the way you want them to Nelba. I have everything crossed that the birth is smooth and that you are blessed with a baby brother or sister for Marco (and Loren) to love.

]]> By: Sarah http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-377 Sarah Mon, 18 Jun 2007 15:14:16 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-377 Praying for you. That God will give you peace and wisdom with the choices you will have to make and that He will be gracious to you! Praying for you. That God will give you peace and wisdom with the choices you will have to make and that He will be gracious to you!

]]> By: Kathryn http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-374 Kathryn Sun, 17 Jun 2007 19:04:34 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-374 I wish they were easier too. I wish they were easier too.

]]> By: Nelba http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-373 Nelba Sun, 17 Jun 2007 15:04:16 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-373 Thanks Leigh and Mel for the wonderful wishes. Kendra, I went to your site and found it very helpful. It is clear that we feel the same way. I really hope that you will have the birth you wish this time and I'll keep in touch. Kathryn, thank you for the support. I hear you about the NICU experience. It is ironic that most of us have to go through that when we are still so naive and that so much actually depend on the decisions we make at that stage. As with you there are things I would have done completely different if I could have the chance again... I think that you are doing very well with Ellie and I'll keep praying that you will receive guidance on the road ahead. It sometimes kills me that it is too late for us. But then, as you say, we don't know the plan ahead of time. As long as our children know that we love them and that what we do is done because it seems to be the right thing at the time, we can look back and we actually need not have regrets. I just wish the decisions were easier ones... Thanks Leigh and Mel for the wonderful wishes.

Kendra, I went to your site and found it very helpful. It is clear that we feel the same way. I really hope that you will have the birth you wish this time and I’ll keep in touch.

Kathryn, thank you for the support. I hear you about the NICU experience. It is ironic that most of us have to go through that when we are still so naive and that so much actually depend on the decisions we make at that stage. As with you there are things I would have done completely different if I could have the chance again…

I think that you are doing very well with Ellie and I’ll keep praying that you will receive guidance on the road ahead.

It sometimes kills me that it is too late for us. But then, as you say, we don’t know the plan ahead of time. As long as our children know that we love them and that what we do is done because it seems to be the right thing at the time, we can look back and we actually need not have regrets.

I just wish the decisions were easier ones…

]]> By: Kathryn http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-371 Kathryn Sat, 16 Jun 2007 12:08:49 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-371 Certainly not too much to ask. You are totally right about what you say about doctors. Your situation with Loren and the g-tube was very similar to ours. We were talked into it and it was "necessitated" by the doctors not for Ellie's best interest but that of the hospital and insurance companies. The NICU was turning some babies away because they were full. We refused the Nissen. So they sent her home g-tube and malfunctioning shunt. She got more brain damage - it took out her cerebellum and caused a life of greater disability. Who's fault was it - ours - yes we were responsible along with being mad and understanding had we refused the g-tube she would have been in the hospital longer and they would have caught the shunt malfunction earlier. There are a few NICU decisions that we made that I will take in agony to my grave. We are lucky that Ellie made it. Who knows at the end of the day what the big plan is for a child's life. But you are so right - people who have not walked it have blinders on. They still think doctors know all and are beyond human fallibility when really their chances of fallibleness are greater than your average joe and the stakes are higher because doctoring is imprecise at best. I would be surprised if you weren't "confrontational" after all you have lived through. You go ahead and be that way. It's totally reasonable. Dave said that to me once while we were in the NICU and again when I was fighting with the school and it was hard to be at odds with him on top of all. But really it was just his own stress in the situation and general avoidance of confrontation. You are a fighter and have needed to be to survive. It would be a bit nuts really if you did nt have any trepidation and opinions about what you are facing. You have seen the worst of the worst in how they treated you and Loren. I wish your wish to have Loren beside you and new baby safely in tow could come true with all my heart. I will be thinking of you and imaging you having an easy non breach healthy delivery of your new little one. Kathryn Certainly not too much to ask. You are totally right about what you say about doctors. Your situation with Loren and the g-tube was very similar to ours. We were talked into it and it was “necessitated” by the doctors not for Ellie’s best interest but that of the hospital and insurance companies. The NICU was turning some babies away because they were full. We refused the Nissen. So they sent her home g-tube and malfunctioning shunt. She got more brain damage – it took out her cerebellum and caused a life of greater disability. Who’s fault was it – ours – yes we were responsible along with being mad and understanding had we refused the g-tube she would have been in the hospital longer and they would have caught the shunt malfunction earlier. There are a few NICU decisions that we made that I will take in agony to my grave.

We are lucky that Ellie made it. Who knows at the end of the day what the big plan is for a child’s life. But you are so right – people who have not walked it have blinders on. They still think doctors know all and are beyond human fallibility when really their chances of fallibleness are greater than your average joe and the stakes are higher because doctoring is imprecise at best.

I would be surprised if you weren’t “confrontational” after all you have lived through. You go ahead and be that way. It’s totally reasonable. Dave said that to me once while we were in the NICU and again when I was fighting with the school and it was hard to be at odds with him on top of all. But really it was just his own stress in the situation and general avoidance of confrontation.

You are a fighter and have needed to be to survive. It would be a bit nuts really if you did nt have any trepidation and opinions about what you are facing. You have seen the worst of the worst in how they treated you and Loren.

I wish your wish to have Loren beside you and new baby safely in tow could come true with all my heart.

I will be thinking of you and imaging you having an easy non breach healthy delivery of your new little one.

Kathryn

]]> By: Kendra http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-369 Kendra Fri, 15 Jun 2007 17:48:08 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-369 Oh, by-the-way...My baby was breech at 32 weeks. I did went to a chiro who knew the Webster technique and did moxibustion (any accupuncturist can show you how to do it). In 1 week the baby turned and has stayed head down. 36 weeks is DEFINITELY not too late! Oh, by-the-way…My baby was breech at 32 weeks. I did went to a chiro who knew the Webster technique and did moxibustion (any accupuncturist can show you how to do it). In 1 week the baby turned and has stayed head down. 36 weeks is DEFINITELY not too late!

]]> By: Kendra http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-368 Kendra Fri, 15 Jun 2007 17:46:54 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-368 I am 37 weeks pregnant and am having a VBAC this time. You are not alone in your thinking or your feelings. My hospital, for instance wants to have a fetal monitor on me continuously. I feel that this will slow down my labor because I won't be able to walk and move and go into the tub as I please. There are lots of hospital and doctor policies that are created more to protect the doctor and facility rather than the mother and baby. You should check out my blog, because VBAC is ALL I talk about :) Also, if you want more support and ideas about VBAC versus c-section, my favorite forum is: http://www.mothering.com/discussions/forumdisplay.php?f=21 I am 37 weeks pregnant and am having a VBAC this time. You are not alone in your thinking or your feelings. My hospital, for instance wants to have a fetal monitor on me continuously. I feel that this will slow down my labor because I won’t be able to walk and move and go into the tub as I please. There are lots of hospital and doctor policies that are created more to protect the doctor and facility rather than the mother and baby. You should check out my blog, because VBAC is ALL I talk about :) Also, if you want more support and ideas about VBAC versus c-section, my favorite forum is: http://www.mothering.com/discussions/forumdisplay.php?f=21

]]> By: Mel http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-367 Mel Fri, 15 Jun 2007 13:26:19 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-367 No its not too much to ask. I too am praying that things will go smoothly for you and the baby. No its not too much to ask. I too am praying that things will go smoothly for you and the baby.

]]> By: Mel http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-366 Mel Fri, 15 Jun 2007 13:25:52 +0000 http://chocolachillie.wordpress.com/2007/06/15/hello-soul-mate/#comment-366 No its not too much to ask? I too am praying that things will go smoothly for you and the baby. No its not too much to ask? I too am praying that things will go smoothly for you and the baby.

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